Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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