Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
