u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
