Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
