Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
where does the pee come out of this thing
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
