I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize
