Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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