Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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