just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
