My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
this is an emotional support booty call
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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