it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize