It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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