what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
