I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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