You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize