i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
We are two peas in an std pod
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
