need another drink. this is the easiest way
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
