He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Randomize