i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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