fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
