I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
