i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
