It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
