the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
When are your genitals available?
and you fell through a lawn chair
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Randomize
