it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Randomize