I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Randomize
