Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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