then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
