I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
