I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
