I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
