Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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