So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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