win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
