Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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