i think my mom watched the whole time
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
