Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
