he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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