Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
