We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
