On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
