apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
