well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
