I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
