i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
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