my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
