I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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