im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
