The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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