how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
